| September
25, 2000 I Can Hear Music/Aspirin & Art Cars |
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It was
early evening before we got back to Alameda on Saturday.
The drive home just about killed me ... driving west from Walnut Creek in pokey freeway traffic, directly into the sun, for almost an hour. I wore two pairs of sunglasses and kept my head in David's lap for most of the ride. (Interpret that as you will.) Nothing had put a dent in it: not Aleve, not Tylenol, not sinus meds, not Pamprin ... not even a twenty-minute snooze in the Subaru, as we drove to Walnut Creek. It was the most excruciating headache of my life. The visit with David's family had been relatively painless ... or it would have been painless, if it hadn't felt as though someone were attempting to extract my brain through my ears with a pair of barbecue tongs. Mostly I just sat there next to David in Mr. and Mrs. Ю僱êrvØ¡'s tasteful living room, smiling vacantly and nodding once in a while. I think I said ten words, altogether. (I'm sure by this point they're beginning to think I was dropped repeatedly on my head as an infant, but there wasn't much I could do to raise my Q-rating with them just then.) Once we got home, I tucked my pitiful, pathetic butt into bed. But first I took two aspirin. I always resist aspirin. I don't know why. I think aspirin just seems too obvious, somehow, too simple. Aspirin was what Grandma gave us when we were little. Aspirin isn't groovy. Aspirin is a cliché. But aspirin did the trick. Sunday morning I woke up ... and the little guys in the orchestra pit had packed up their instruments and gone home. I could still hear them in the distance -- like a radio playing quietly in the apartment four doors down the hall -- but they weren't playing just for me, anymore. I continued taking half-doses of aspirin all day Sunday. I kept the apartment dark and quiet all day. While David was off taking care of family obligations, I read and napped and wrote a tiny bit of e-mail and napped some more. By the end of the day, I was pain-free. Mostly I just felt ... limp. And empty. And weirdly cleansed, like some sort of huge exotic tropical storm had blown through my psyche. The feeling persists today, as I head into another Hell Week with Franz. It's too soon to tell if this week is going to be the same kind of nightmare last week was ... but I'm packing aspirin. And earplugs. Just in case.
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