July 16, 1998
                              The Art Of Grocery Shopping For One

Well, OK. I clearly have not gotten the "Grocery Shopping For One" stuff down yet.

I've been divorced and on my own for a few months now. Some adjustments have been easier than others: answering my own phone, for one thing (as opposed to hurtling over a houseful of teenagers in order to get to the telephone first). Killing my own bugs. Paying my own bills. Fixing my own leaky toilet.

It's great to walk into the bathroom and know my blender is gonna be next to the bathtub, right where I left it the night before.

But for some reason, buying groceries for just one person is an art I have yet to perfect.

Look at the groceries I bought today. I mean, LOOK at them. Boneless skinless chicken breasts were on sale, $1.98 a pound ... but how the hell am I gonna eat EIGHTEEN of them?

TWENTY ROLLS of toilet paper?

A 20 lb. bag of carrots??

And what about this one: a 96 oz. can of Lemon Pledge when I have precisely THREE pieces of actual "furniture" in the entire apartment? What the heck is THAT about, do you suppose?

Obviously I need to either: A.) Start shopping at 7-11, where I can get in far less trouble for even MORE money, or B.) Remind myself once in awhile that I'm not shopping for a family of five anymore.

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