Irony Curtain

Summer 2000
The Irony Curtain

As usual, there was some stupid message board war going on, with people running back and forth like angry ants, calling each other names, and making threats to "break your typing fingers." Cliques were formed, bitter vituperative email exchanged; yeah, we've seen it all before. So it goes. For me, such blather is just a high diving board, and off I leap...

>> Folks, he is so hated on the board Naked Luncheonette that persons are looking to hurt him IRW.<<

To my way of thinking, that is a recommendation, not a criticism.

And anyone who gets their mind tied up into knots of anger, such that they actually contemplate hurting someone because of insulting words they read on a message board, well, that person is investing too much emotion in this medium.

When you walk by a wall and read an anonymous "F*** You!" hurled out against an unfeeling universe by some street punk with a can of Krylon, do you then wait there for a couple of days in the hope of beating the crap out of him because he insulted you?

Somewhere, there is an Anti-(Your Screen Name). On the Realworld bus, you can avoid them by hopping off at the next stop and taking a cab...and you'll never see them again. Here, in Cyberspace, they will find you and sit down next to you, crack open a 40 oz., and lean over and give you a big French kiss, and there isn't a thing you can do about it, except to impotently rage against the unfairness of the very existence of such a hideous creature.

All the talk of hitting, and reporting to the IRS, and breaking fingers: Impotent cant and humbug, powerless rage and nothing more.

I say again: You have the ability to strip your online enemies of their power: don't read them. Ostracize the boring and the vapid; eschew dolts, condemn the emptyheaded to the black hole of unread non-existence. And while you're at it, clean up those dishes in the sink.

Ð®å±êrvÕ¡: Inventor of the Irony Curtain

Then, in one of my more brilliant (or stupid) moves (it depends on whether you understand that I actually KNOW what I'm doing), I invent the SELF FLAME, a vicious ad hominem attack on ME, BY me.

>>And while you're at it, clean up those dishes in the sink.<<

I want to say once and for all time, that I am sick to death of this stuck-up, self-important, know-it-all prig DRaftervoi coming in here and telling me how to run my life. As far as I'm concerned, he ought to go pound nails up his nose and then kill himself. He's a puffed up little cock-a-whoop, and if I ever have the extreme displeasure of meeting him in real life, why, I'm going to kick the living shit out of him, and then turn him over to the cops for a Rodney King-style beating.

In the meanwhile, I'm putting this rat-bastard on ignore, and I'm never going to read his illiterate homosexual rantings ever again.

F*** this DRaftervoi guy, and his whole family.

Ð®ätërvØ¡: kiss your dinosaur ass goodbye

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