December 30, 1998
Debi & Dave

Working on it ... mostly offline, so I can keep our telephone line open. (And no, not because I'm waiting for Lorenzo Lamas to call. I've given up on that idea. It's because we're actually finally miraculously getting the GAS turned on today, here in The Castle, and the gas company is supposed to call before they drop by, which I am absolutely certain will be any minute since they PROMISED it would be "around noon" and it's 12:51 P.M. now, and utility companies are supposed to be reliable, right? ... and yes, I would be interested in hearing about that swamp land in Florida asamatteroffact ...)

In the meantime,
click here to read that last fabulous entry ... and then check back later.

Later That Day:

I want to take this opportunity to send greetings to two very special people in my life.

First of all, my little sister Debi celebrates an important birthday today.  (I'm probably not supposed to tell you which "important birthday," although it's somewhere between twenty-nine and thirty-one.)
 We are eleven years apart in age, and through circumstances beyond our control  --  she lived with our mother, I lived with my grandparents  --  we saw each other only occasionally during our growing-up years. But she has nonetheless been a pivotal player in my life, all along. When she was born, she was the magical baby sister I had wished for on birthday candles and evening stars. When she grew a little older, she became my frankly-adoring, all-forgiving #1 Fan  ...  even when I let her down. (I still owe you a Heart concert.)  As a teenager, camping out on my sofa/emptying my refrigerator/running up my phone bill, she gave me a valuable *preview* of what motherhood would be like, ten years or so down the road.  And when she became an adult, she set an example of sobriety, responsibility and courage for me  ...  one that has taken me ten years to emulate. In this case I hope that later is better than never.

So  ...  Happy Birthday to my beautiful, caring, complex, talented, marvelous sister. Pregnant is a good *look* for you, kiddo. (And so is purple, thank god.) I love you!!

And then, equally notably:  this week, on December 28th, David quietly celebrated two years of sobriety.  (We accidentally overlooked the occasion, so caught up in the business of getting back to *normal* after the holidays.  It was the following day that he looked at me and said "You know what? We forgot something."  I've got it marked on the calendar now, though -- along with my own sobriety *anniversary* -- and it will never be forgotten again.)  I never met David face-to-face while he was still drinking, but I remember talking to him online a lot back then. He careened wildly between Obnoxious Goof in the chat room and Caustic Funny Guy in private conversation.  He made me laugh. Sometimes he pissed me off.  I was both repelled and fascinated. I never actually made the connection between his erratic behavior and alcohol in those days, but then again I couldn't even make that *connection* in my OWN life at the time. Had we met IRL, three years ago  --  when we were both such damaged goods  --  I very likely would have still fallen in love with him, then and there. The *spark* that I see in him today would have existed then, even clouded by alcohol.  

And it would have been a disaster of epic proportions.

So I am thankful beyond thankful that it took us three years' worth of respective starts and stops to get us where we are.  Because I look at him now -- at this calm, centered, clear-eyed, wondrously ALIVE human being  --  still more than a little on the side of goofy, thank god  -- and I can't imagine him any other way.

Congratulations, Honey. I am proud of you beyond words. I want to be just like you when I grow up. (Except, of course, I'm not much interested in being able to pee standing up. But otherwise, I'm there.)  And I mean it when I tell you that you are, quite simply, the best person I know. xox



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